As with so many bridge design competitions (see past blog posts ad nauseam), I'm left wondering exactly what motivated some of the entrants to this one. This is a serious competition for a genuinely useful river crossing which appears already to have much of its funding in place. However, quite a number of the entrants seem to have put forward entries which nobody could even contemplate building, gaudy scribbles which could be held up only by a wing, a prayer and the magic of Photoshop. Why would anyone put so much effort into something which clearly will go straight into the discard pile?
Of the more sensible entries, it's interesting to consider the many different ways in which the bridge designs have been depicted, from razor-sharp photomontage through to whimsical artists impressions, even one that depicts a 21st century bridge being used by 19th century Londoners.
With 74 entries on display, it seems foolhardy to attempt any proper consideration of their merits. I reckon there are at most a couple of dozen which have a serious prospect of further consideration by the competition jury panel. And how could anyone top this ultra-quick skewering?
So, with the aim of avoiding all that hard work on my part, what's the reaction on Twitter?
Checking out the various designs for the new Nine Elms-Pimlico Bridge. Interesting who the architects see using it. pic.twitter.com/NBodVfHNp8
— Danny Leigh (@dannytheleigh) February 23, 2015
Shoutout to the Nine Elms bridge entry that features an Union Jack Zeppelin in the background http://t.co/QdGzfgt86D pic.twitter.com/K276SSdbUm
— Dan W (@iamdanw) February 23, 2015
All the Pimlico-Nine Elms bridge designs. It appears some architects might be overpaid. http://t.co/843MJINTEN (via @peter_watts)
— Jason Sinclair (@jlsinc) February 23, 2015
Tower Bridge and Waterloo bridge will be looking at eachother, secretly rolling their eyes and tutting http://t.co/2zSlJ8uczr #pimlicobridge
— TheHamptonite (@TheHamptonite) February 23, 2015
Looking at some of these Nine Elms to Pimlico bridge submissions, someone's been adding liberal amounts of LSD to the water supply
— Chris Allen (@ChrisAllen_92) February 23, 2015
These are for LONDON right? Not Mars in 10 years time? http://t.co/CnshkPP3oz
— MollyEm (@MollyEm2) February 23, 2015
Some of these bridge designs are ludicrous. Correction: all of them are. http://t.co/l240FxvIsn @Londonist pic.twitter.com/xNcCGznKBt
— David Sim (@davidsim) February 23, 2015
Oh ffs! Take a look at these monstrosities: Nine Elms To Pimlico Bridge Designs http://t.co/W3VbW4aGN7
— David Mills (@DavidMillsDept) February 23, 2015
some truly bonkers schemes for the nine elms bridge http://t.co/7SBMzSulMU
— Georgina (@georginagem) February 23, 2015
Nine Elms to Pimlico bridge designs prove Rowan Moore’s point: “iconic” = “whooshy”. Calatrava has a lot 2 answer for http://t.co/UDntueFt8L
— Oliver Morton (@Eaterofsun) February 23, 2015
Nine Elms Bridge comp has produced brilliant (& bonkers) designs. A shame @TheGardenBridge wasn't open to competition http://t.co/MzQ3IaPqD1
— Beckett Rankine (@beckettrankine) February 23, 2015
Ah, a good old' bridge design competition. many of the #NineElmsBridge entries remind me of the Tower Bridge efforts pic.twitter.com/XAdvAwmThq
— Rik (@Riksmithuk) February 23, 2015
Some of these Nine Elms bridges are just taking the piss http://t.co/jDkxHvUAgR via @Londonist #Vauxhall
— Jason_Cobb (@Jason_Cobb) February 23, 2015
These Nine Elms bridge designs are mad. What was the concept for this? Tennis racket with water fall & magic rainbow? pic.twitter.com/75dOlu81S4
— Estelle Jarvis (@Estellejarvis93) February 23, 2015
Who on earth designed some of the Nine Elms to Pimlico bridge schemas?! It's like they've forgotten the main purpose of a bridge.
— Davy (@The60ftOctopus) February 23, 2015
A bridge too far: designs for a(nother) unnecessary new footbridge over the Thames to the developer orgy at Battersea http://t.co/JtSTv7zqAA
— Tom Dyckhoff (@tomdyckhoff) February 23, 2015
Nine Elms bridge competition. At what point do we just get to stop all this?
— Hana Loftus (@hanaloftus) February 23, 2015